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21 December 2005 @ 08:26 pm
Power and Control- Chapter 8  

Ah, a nice bit of lemony goodness to balance out the badness...somewhat. 

Power and Control- Chapter 8






            Sakaki was having the most wonderful dream.  He was standing on a high cliff overlooking a breathtaking seascape with the salty ocean air whipping his hair around his face as he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.  He could hear the crash of the waves on the rocks below and the cries of the gulls that circled overhead.  There was a distant clang from the buoy that was tossed about in the churning waters.  It was a perfect day.


            Sakaki opened his eyes and noticed that one of the seagulls had landed a few inches to his right.  He thought it was strange that the bird would be so daring when there was no food present to warrant such a close encounter.  The large white bird cocked its head and looked up at Sakaki with beady black eyes. 


            “Haruto,” The gull greeted him.  Sakaki was taken aback.  The bird had just spoken to him, and it knew his name.  There was also a nagging feeling that he recognized the gull’s voice from somewhere. 


            “How do you know my name?” He asked the gull.  The bird tilted its head to the side once again and stared blankly at him.


            “Haruto!” The gull said again with more force behind it and flapped its black-tipped wings at Sakaki to punctuate its statement.   


            “You sound like Michael,” Sakaki suddenly realized.  “Isn’t that funny?” he said to the gull. From the way the bird’s eyes narrowed, he got the impression that the bird did not agree.  In fact, it looked rather annoyed with Sakaki for some reason.




            Sakaki was pulled from the dream by a hand pushing roughly on his shoulder.  He swatted blindly in the general direction of the nuisance and rolled over onto his side, trying to stay asleep.  But the hands were persistent and kept shaking his whole body, keeping the blissful slumber just out of reach.


            “Damn it, Haruto.  Wake Up!”  Michael’s voice was clearly irritated.  Sakaki groaned and rolled over to face his lover.


            “Alright, you win.  I’m awake,” Sakaki said as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.


            “Haruto, we overslept.  You need to get out of here.  It’s already morning.  The others will be coming in soon-“


            “Whoa, slow down, Michael.  Give my brain a second to catch up, will you?”  Sakaki said, interrupting Michael’s frantic speech.  He sat up straight and had to close his eyes as the room spun out of control.  His head felt like it weighed a hundred pounds and his stomach did a complete somersault.  


            “But Robin and the others will be coming…hey, are you okay?” Michael said as he took note of Sakaki’s sickly grimace.      


            “Yeah, if the room would stop spinning,” Sakaki said dryly.  “Man, this is some trippy shit.  I think I can feel the rotation of the Earth.”


            “Maybe you have a concussion.” 


            “Don’t think so,” Sakaki said as he tenderly pressed his fingers against his bruised forehead.  “At least Amon didn’t seem to think so last night.  No, this feels more like the mother of all hangovers without the fun, drunk stage first.  Is there a giant bruise on my forehead?”  Michael’s bright blue eyes surveyed his lover’s face. 


            “No, it’s slightly discolored but it still looks a little swollen.” 


            “Great, that just means that it will probably get worse as the day goes on,” Sakaki said wearily.  Michael frowned at him.


            “This means that we are going to have to come up with a cover story for you now.  The others are bound to notice that the two of us are all beat up,” The hacker said as he pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them.  It was a gesture that Sakaki was beginning to recognize as a protective posture that Michael assumed whenever he was feeling overwhelmed.  Sakaki reached over and pulled the younger boy into an embrace.


            “Michael, my sweet Michael,” Sakaki whispered softly.  “In all this early morning panic you forgot one thing.”  The redhead pulled back and gave Sakaki a puzzled look.  “It’s Saturday, silly,” Sakaki answered with a light chuckle.  “No one is going to be coming in early today and Amon told me last night that he is going to call the others to postpone tonight’s hunt.  We have the whole day to ourselves.” 


            Michael’s face lit up like a thousand watt bulb.  For the first time in the few months that they had been together, they could be alone for more than a few short hours.  It was the best feeling in the world, and it made Sakaki’s heart swell to see the feeling reciprocated in Michael’s eyes.


            “What time is it?” Sakaki asked around a yawn.  Michael twisted around to take a look at the clock on his nightstand.


            “It’s almost six.”


            “Six?” Sakaki groaned.  “Way too early to get up on a Saturday. We’re going back to sleep.”  He pulled Michael back down to the bed and spooned up behind him.  


            When Sakaki nuzzled his face into the back of Michael’s neck, he smelled the unmistakable odor of burnt hair.  Puzzled, he propped himself up on his elbow to investigate.  Gathering Michael’s hair into a loose ponytail, he gently lifted the flame-orange locks out of the way.  The ends of Michael’s hair that had come in contact with the collar last night were singed.  The skin around Michael’s neck and collarbone where the thick chain rested was bright red and peeling slightly.  In their rush to treat Michael’s other injuries last night, Amon and Sakaki had overlooked these burns.


            “Michael? Your neck….it’s burned pretty bad,” Sakaki said. 


            “Yeah, the collar always does that,” Michael responded, sounding suspiciously like he was half asleep.


            “Well, does it hurt?” Sakaki asked feeling somewhat exasperated by Michael’s calm.


            “Not really.  It’s like a bad sunburn.”  Michael pulled the covers up higher on his shoulder. 


            “But the skin is starting to peel,” Sakaki said as he pulled the covers back down.  Michael rolled over quickly to snatch the blanket from Sakaki’s grasp.


            “Its fine,” the red head said curtly.  He then rolled back on his side, facing away from Sakaki and pulled the blanket up so that only the top of his head was showing.  Surprised by the hacker’s behavior, Sakaki inched closer and pulled the covers away from his lover’s face.


            “What’s the matter?” He asked softly.  Michael sighed heavily.


            “Nothing.  I’m fine.”  From the tone the younger teen used, Sakaki was not inclined to believe him. 


            “No, you’re not.  What’s bothering you?” The blonde tried again.  


            “Nothing!  God, leave it alone,” Michael snapped in frustration. 


Sakaki blinked in confusion for a moment before rolling to face the opposite direction.  The only contact between the two was where their backs touched as they attempted to get comfortable on Michael’s twin sized bed.  Sakaki was pressed as close to the cool stone wall as possible to give the other boy as much room as he could.  If Michael was going to act all pissy, then he would too.  He gave a hard tug on the blanket to purposely pull it off of Michael.  Michael answered by yanking it back.


“Stop hogging the blanket,” Michael said as he tightened his hold on the fleecy green blanket.


            “I’m not hogging,” Sakaki answered petulantly.  “You’re the one who keeps pulling it off me.”  The blonde rolled his shoulder towards the wall so that the blanket became trapped under his body weight.  He felt Michael give a couple of tugs before giving up.


            “Fine, have it your way,” Michael said with an annoyed sigh and curled into the fetal position. 


            The two boys were quiet for a long stretch of minutes.  The silence was incredibly uncomfortable and Sakaki could feel the tension radiating from Michael where their backs touched.   Unable to stand it any longer, the blonde rolled over and wrapped his arms around the other boy.


            “Michael, what is it?  Something is obviously bothering you,” he whispered.  “Is it me?  Because I’m here?”  The body in his arms went rigid.  “Talk to me, Michael.”


            “I’m not used to having someone here with me,” the redhead began hesitantly. “On the mornings after Zaizen’s visits especially.”  Michael rolled onto his back with a slight wince of pain.  “I’m usually more composed by the time you and the others show up for work.”


            It was at that moment that it dawned on Sakaki that this was their first real ‘morning after’ and it was not the good kind, either.  In the five months since he found Michael in a semi-conscious heap outside his room, Sakaki had never had to deal with the hacker post-Zaizen.  Sure, there were times when the old man would show up late at night and demand oral sex from the boy, but he seemed to brush off those occurrences rather easily, so Sakaki figured he had a handle on things.  Even after they began their clandestine affair, Sakaki knew that Zaizen had not asked for more than the occasional blowjob.  The blonde had separated Michael’s time with Zaizen and his own into two rooms inside his mind.  As he began to spend more time with the quirky redhead, the knowledge of what was happening behind Zaizen’s closed office door after hours seemed to get buried by newer, happier memories until it became a stray thought in the back of his head.  Michael even admitted that weeks had gone by without the perverted director making an appearance.  It made it so easy to forget.  At least, it was until a few days ago when everything caught up with the two lovers with unparalleled vengeance.  


            “Do you want me to leave? You know, so you can be alone for a while,” Sakaki asked carefully.  He did not want to intrude on Michael if he needed time by himself to deal with all that he was put through last night.     


            “Do you want to leave?” Michael retorted somewhat defensively.


            “Only if you want me to.”


            Michael sighed again and turned towards Sakaki.  He threw his arm over the blonde’s chest and rested his head on his shoulder.  “I want you to stay,” he said simply.


            “Then I’ll stay,” Sakaki said as he wrapped his arm around Michael’s shoulders.  “Now, let’s go back to sleep.  I’m beat.”  Michael nodded in agreement and wriggled around until he found a comfortable position.  After a few moments of silence, Sakaki began to chuckle softly.


            “Now what?” Michael moaned.


            “Nothing, I was just thinking about something funny.  When you woke me up before I was having the strangest dream.  You were a seagull.”


            “A seagull?  What was I doing?”


            “Yelling at me.” 


            “Why am I not surprised?  Go to sleep, Haruto.”





            Sakaki opened his eyes and found himself alone in the tiny bed.  He rubbed at his sleep encrusted eyes and sat up slowly.  Thankfully, the room stayed put this time.  There was still a dull throbbing behind his eyes but it was minimal compared to what it had been.  A few aspirins and a cup of coffee would put a damper on that.  He glanced over to the bedside table.  The digital clock informed him that it was almost ten o’clock.  Sakaki could hear the sounds of running water coming from behind the closed bathroom door.  Michael was in the shower.  The thought of Michael naked and wet caused his morning erection to twitch.


            Throwing the covers away from his body, Sakaki put his bare feet down on the cold stone floor.  The shock of it jolted his body into full awareness.  He made a mental note to pick up some throw rugs for Michael so he would not have to deal with getting frostbite first thing in the morning.  Sakaki stretched his arms over his head and yawned loudly.  A peculiar smile touched his lips when he thought of Michael in the shower.  He quickly made his way over to the adjoining room, rid himself of his boxers, and opened the door.  A large burst of steam poured out of the room and Sakaki was forced to wait a few seconds before he could make out the bathroom fixtures.  To the left of the door was the shower stall.  Michael’s silhouette could be seen through the etched glass shower door.


            “Michael?” he asked.  His voice echoed off the porcelain and tiles. 


            “Oh…Haruto, you startled me,” Michael gasped.  “You were sleeping so soundly, I didn’t want to wake you.”


            “It’s okay,” Sakaki said as he walked over to the shower and pulled the door open.  “Mind if I join you?” 


            The redhead jumped back in surprise and his hands went down reflexively to cover his groin.  Sakaki laughed softly as he entered the white tiled shower stall and shut the door behind him.


            “Michael, why are you covering up?” Sakaki said with a quirked eyebrow.  “I have seen you naked before, remember?” 


            The hacker blushed furiously and moved his hands to his sides.  “Sorry,” he mumbled with his eyes downcast.  Sakaki put his finger under Michael’s chin and gently lifted it so that their eyes met. 


            “There’s nothing to be sorry about,” he whispered as he lowered his head and brushed his lips against Michael’s.  The redhead jumped at the contact but soon relaxed into the kiss.  They kept it chaste, both of them not wanting to start something they knew they could not, or rather, should not finish.  Sakaki broke off the kiss with a smile as he stepped under the spray of warm water.


            “Haruto!  The bandages on your wrists are getting wet,” Michael exclaimed. 


            “Oh, I forgot all about them,” Sakaki said as he began to unwrap the sopping gauze from his wrists.  Once finished, he opened the shower door and threw them out without looking.  He heard them land somewhere on the bathroom floor with a loud plop.  The blonde was about to continue with the shower when Michael grabbed hold of his forearm and brought his wrist up for closer inspection.  “It’s not as bad as it looks,” Sakaki said to forestall anything the redhead might be thinking.


            “But you were hurt because of me,” the hacker said meekly.


            “Hey, don’t think like that,” Sakaki said as he quickly pulled the other boy into an embrace.  “If anyone is to blame for this situation, believe me, it’s certainly not you.”


            “But…I…if only I…”  Michael was cut off once again by Sakaki’s lips closing over his own.  The redhead kissed him back with a desperation that caught him off guard.  They broke apart only when the necessity to breathe caused them to. 


            “Shh, it’s not your fault,” The blonde said as he carded his hand through the spiky locks on the top of Michael’s head. 


Michael wanted to believe Sakaki, he really did, but there was always that voice in the back of his head that told him he did not deserve happiness.  He had chosen this life over a bullet in the back of the head, and he was a fool to believe the one thing that kept him from completely dying on the inside would last.  Now it was a question of just how much suffering he would have to watch his love endure.  A part of Michael’s heart wept at the fact that Sakaki would do whatever needed to be done because he was so in love with him.  He should not have to do that.  Love should not have to be this way.


“Hey, where did you just go?” Sakaki’s gentle voice stirred Michael from his thoughts.


“Uh, sorry, I was thinking,” the hacker replied.


“About good things, I hope,” Sakaki said.  Michael did not respond, but tried to give his lover a comforting smile and turned to finish rising the soap from his body.


  “How do you feel this morning?” The blonde asked when he noticed the stiffness in Michael’s movements.


“Sore, bruised…the usual,” Michael’s answered with a noncommittal shrug of his shoulders.  “My back feels much better than I thought it would.  It’s only tender in a few spots.”


Sakaki’s eyes drifted to the pale expanse of the redhead’s back.  The raised welts had gone down and there were only a few places where the skin had been damaged enough to leave an abrasion.  Zaizen most likely held himself back from causing too much damage.  Sakaki’s chest tightened at the thought of that horrid man.  How could one person do so much damage to another person…and revel in it? 


No, don’t go there.  You need to be strong for Michael.


“Mind if I get a little water?” Sakaki asked.  He hoped the shift in topic could ease some of his worries.         


Michael moved back to give the blonde room and watched with keen interest as the water cascaded down the wiry body before him.  The hacker reached out to place a hand on his lover’s pale back to let the thick stream of water glide over his hand like a waterfall.  Michael had never showered with anyone before.  He never thought in a million years that the simple act of cleaning oneself could be such a turn on, but here he was, ogling his boyfriend’s ass.  And what a lovely ass it was.  Sakaki’s body was lean and fit.  The sometimes rigorous physical demands of the job kept him that way.  He was a few inches taller than the hacker, but that did not make that much of a difference to either of them.  No, the redhead was content to stand back and watch the muscles of  his lover’s back and arms flex as he wet himself down, not caring that he was starting to feel a chill now that he was no longer under the water.  It was then that a thought hit him.  When Sakaki reached out to grab the bottle of shampoo, Michael stopped him.


“Let me do it, please?” he asked.  Sakaki paused before giving him a smile and a nod of his head.  “I’ve never showered with anyone before,” Michael admitted quietly.  “But I’ve seen it done in movies and sometimes one lover would wash the other’s hair.  I thought that was…I don’t know…sexy.”  Michael felt his cheeks begin to burn with embarrassment. 


“I always thought so too,” Sakaki said as he handed the bottle to Michael.  The hacker took it from him and squeezed a generous amount into the palm of his hand.  Sakaki tilt his head back and closed his eyes as Michael began to message the shampoo into a thick lather.  He could not hold back a contented sigh as Michael’s dexterous fingers eased away the dull throbbing inside his head.  Sakaki felt the strong fingers withdraw and cracked an eye open to see Michael reach around him to detach the shower head.  The hacker carefully rinsed the shampoo from his hair and studiously kept it from running into his eyes.  Once he completed that task he poured some of the conditioner into his hand and ran his fingers through Sakaki’s hair.


“Your hair feels so soft,” Michael whispered.  Sakaki moaned softly in agreement.  “Not like mine, all dried out and brittle.” Michael once again took down the shower head and carefully rinsed out Sakaki’s hair.  The blonde turned to face Michael when he was finished.


“What are you talking about?  Your hair is fine,” Sakaki said to the hacker. 


“No, its not.  It’s nothing like yours and my body is nothing compared to you.  I’m so pale and scrawny, but you…you’re so beautiful,” Michael said breathlessly with his eyes downcast.  Sakaki had never heard Michael sound so down on himself.


“Michael, look at me,” Sakaki ordered.  The redhead reluctantly obeyed.  When Michael’s bright blue eyes meet his pale violet, Sakaki brought his hand up to caress the side of his lover’s face.  “I think you are the most beautiful and intelligent person I have ever known.  I don’t think I have ever felt so strongly about another person in my entire life.  I love you so much.” 


Michael stared at Sakaki for a few heartbeats, unblinking, unbelieving, until he did the only thing he could think of at that moment.  He reached out and grabbed the blonde by the shoulders and pulled him into a searing, desperate kiss.  Sakaki responded immediately and pressed the smaller boy gently into the tiled wall as he slid his tongue into Michael’s mouth.


“I love you too, Haruto,” Michael gasped out between kisses.  “More than anything in the world.”


Sakaki pulled Michael in closer to him at the sound of those words.  Show him.  Show him how much he means to you.  The blonde trailed kisses down the redhead’s neck as he slowly and deliberately moved his hand down his lover’s stomach until his hand closed over the other’s erection.  Michael cried out at the contact and arched his body away from the wall.  Sakaki began to pump him slowly, almost teasingly.  Michael’s entire body shuddered and his fingers clawed at Sakaki’s shoulders. 


“Ungh…god, Haruto…you don’t have to,” Michael attempted to finish, but found that his wits were scattering. 


“Hush, this is for you.  Let me do this for you,” Sakaki answered.  His own voice was husky with passion.  Sakaki turned slightly to grab the bottle of conditioner and squeezed a large dollop into his hand.  Sakaki closed his mouth over the redhead’s once again as he increased the pace of his strokes, tossing the bottle over his shoulder carelessly.  Michael broke off from the kiss and threw his head backwards against the shower wall with a choked groan.  His eyes were wide and unfocused.  Sakaki continued to nip and suck along Michael’s jaw and then concentrated on the spot directly behind Michael’s ear.   The smaller body quivered in his arms as Sakaki pressed himself against his lover.  His own erection was begging for attention but he fought back the urge to touch himself.  The hacker was panting heavily now and his cheeks were flushed bright red.  Sakaki knew that he had to be close and increased the rhythm of his strokes as he gently thrust himself against Michael’s hip. 


“Come for me, Michael,” Sakaki whispered into his lover’s ear as he bit down on the fleshy lobe.  “You’re so beautiful when you come.”  That seemed to be the catalyst that Michael needed, because no sooner had the words left Sakaki’s mouth when the redhead’s whole body convulsed. 


“Haruto!” Michael screamed as he erupted all over Sakaki’s hand and chest.


“That’s it, baby,” Sakaki gasped.  The whole scene had him aroused beyond belief and to his surprise, his own body was quickly overcome and he came with a sharp cry.  When the tremors slowed, Sakaki pulled Michael into a hug and buried his face in the crook of his neck.  Michael could only hang limp in Sakaki’s arms, utterly spent.


“Thank you,” the redhead managed weakly.  Sakaki kissed the top of his head.


“Any time, babe…anytime.” 






            After drying off and getting dressed, Michael and Sakaki lounged on the bed, drinking the horribly bitter coffee Sakaki had made and eating what was left of yesterday’s doughnuts.  Michael ventured another sip of the strong brew and tried to hide his reaction.


            “Don’t drink it if you don’t like it,” Sakaki said after seeing Michael wince for the third time.  “You’re not hurting my feelings, I know I can’t cook.”


            “Or make coffee,” Michael added as he set the mug on his nightstand.  Sakaki scowled at him playfully.  Their peaceful moment was broken by the musical chimes of Sakaki’s cel phone.  Startled by the sound, the blonde jumped up from the bed and grabbed the phone off of Michael’s desk.


            “Hello?...Oh, Amon…yes…not that I saw…okay.”  Sakaki flipped the phone closed and turned to Michael.  “That was Amon; he’s on his way over.”  The hacker groaned and buried his face in the pillow.


            “So much for having the day to ourselves,” Sakaki said disappointedly as he sat back down next to Michael. 




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