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12 December 2005 @ 08:05 pm
Power and Control- Chapter 5  

Oh, two evil cliffhangers in a row....I'm so bad ;)  And so we break through some of the ice that surrounds Amon.  Beneath that stony exterior hides a wealth of pain and anguish.  I've only begun to scratch the surface with him.

Now, I want to take a moment to talk about Zaizen.  There may be some people out there who feel that I've reduced him to just another bad guy who uses rape as his weapon of choice.  Now, just because I haven't explored his motivations yet, dosen't mean that he does not have them.  Rape is not about sex, it is about power.  It is about exerting your power over another and forcing them to bend to your will.  The forced submission is what rapists get off on.  Zaizen is power hungry.  It is not completely illogical that it would factor into other aspects of his life.  Please keep that in mind.  I plan on getting into Zaizen's head in later chapters, but for now we are getting the story as seen through the victims eyes.  They are not privy to such information.


Power and Control- Chapter 5





            Sakaki stared at the monitor absolutely horrified.  This could not be happening.  Amon was his only way out of this mess.  If Amon was no better off than Michael, how the hell was he planning on helping them?  In what seemed like seconds, any hope that Sakaki might have had of getting Michael out of this situation was torn away from him.  Sakaki turned his gaze to the man seated across from him, the man who was at the very root of this problem.  Takuma Zaizen.   Sakaki’s lips curled into a snarl.


            “You really are tenacious,” The gray haired man began.  “It’s a quality that I usually admire.  However, in this situation I hope you do realize that whatever you had planned on doing will be futile.”  Zaizen calmly snipped the end off of a cigar and ran it under his nose, inhaling deeply and savoring the flavor.  The older man leaned forward to the lighter on his desk and lit the cigar.  Sakaki choked on the thick, white smoke that Zaizen deliberately blew in his direction.


            “I hope you realize that one day I will see you brought down,” Sakaki replied, his voice raspy from the cigar smoke.  Zaizen laughed at his remark.


            “You should know that I do not take threats lightly, boy.  Just remember what I can do to what’s left of your precious family,” Zaizen said menacingly.  Sakaki felt his fingernails bite into the palm of his hand as he clenched his fist tighter. 


            “You can’t get away with this!” Sakaki yelled.   His outburst just seemed to amuse Zaizen even more.   The old man smiled broadly as he reached up to take the cigar out of his mouth and hold it between his thick fingers.  


            “I can and I will, boy.  You have no power here.  Those two are mine and I suppose you can now say that I own you as well.” 


            “Never!” Sakaki screamed.  He felt tears sting his eyes and shut them tightly to prevent them from falling.  He would not show such weakness in front of this man.  


            “As much as I would like to finish this discussion, I do have other matters that need my attention.  You are dismissed,” Zaizen said as he turned his monitor back around and went about his work.  Sakaki stood and wavered slightly.  His legs felt like rubber and his stomach had taken up residence in his throat.  He walked to the office door determined to not look back, but just as he was about to turn the door handle, he heard Zaizen’s voice.


            “Oh, Sakaki.” The old man’s bass voice managed to sound light, but Sakaki still cringed from it.  The blonde haired teen turned to look at the man behind the desk.  “I look forward to our next meeting.  Perhaps you and Michael can keep me entertained until then, hmm.”  Sakaki visibly paled at the insinuation and pulled open the door to escape this contemptible man. 


            Once outside the office he stood there trying to get some control over his emotions.  He scrubbed his hands over his face and ran them through his hair.  Sakaki felt his stomach do a few somersaults and his head felt like there was a drum line in it.  After taking a few deep breaths he felt composed enough to head back into the main office.  Sakaki rounded the small corner and paused.  Amon was leaning over Michael’s desk looking over something with the hacker.  As soon as they felt his presence they both looked up at him.


            “Sakaki?” Michael’s voice sounded relieved and concerned at the same time.  Sakaki opened his mouth as if to speak but no words came out.  He looked to Michael’s face and the dark bruise on his cheek that was just visible under the frame of his glasses.  Sakaki thought about how that bruise came to be and who gave it to him.  Images of Michael being held down and brutalized on Zaizen’s desk flashed across his mind’s eye.  It was one thing to know that Michael was being abused but to see it first hand was utterly appalling.  Sakaki’s eyes drifted from his lover’s face and settled on Amon who wore the same look of confused concern as Michael.  The thought that Amon had been put through the same hell as Michael made Sakaki’s stomach heave.  He clasped a hand over his mouth and bolted toward the bathroom.


            “Haruto!” Michael called out as he made a move to go after Sakaki.  Amon’s hand landed on Michael’s shoulder and the tall man forcibly pushed the redhead back into his chair.


            “I’ll go,” Amon said, and walked calmly toward the restroom.






Sakaki barely made it to the restroom in time before his stomach expelled its contents.  Once there was nothing left to regurgitate, his body dry-heaved a few more times.  Exhausted and panting, he collapsed on the floor in front of the toilet and sat bonelessly, staring at nothing in particular.  Sakaki shivered slightly against the cool tiled wall of the stall.  His clothes clung to his body from the cold sweat that had broken out.  He closed his eyes as another wave of nausea swept over him. 


            How could things go so wrong so quickly?  What are we going to do now?


            The sound of the restroom door opening brought Sakaki back from his thoughts.  He struggled to stand, his body weak from before.  He pushed open the door to the stall and stepped out to face none other than Amon.


            “Are you all right?” The dark haired man asked, noticing the pallor of his co-worker.  He looked genuinely concerned.


 Sakaki thought about his answer for a moment.  No, he was most definitely not all right.  He didn’t trust himself to speak so he shook his head in the negative and moved over to the sink.  There he rinsed the foul taste from his mouth and splashed cold water on his face.  When he was finished Amon handed him a few paper towels, which he accepted with a quiet ‘thank you’.  After drying his face he disposed of the paper towels and turned to Amon.


“He knows.”


“I figured as much.  How?” Amon asked.


“Video cameras.  They are all over the place.  He has some hidden in Michael’s room.  He saw us…” Sakaki’s voice trailed off too embarrassed to finish.  Amon nodded his head in understanding.  “That bastard is probably watching us right now, gloating,” Sakaki said as he began to pace in frustration.  


“What did he say to you?”  Amon inquired as his eyes followed Sakaki in his path around the small restroom.


“What do you think he said?  Basically, ‘Shut up or else’.”


“Or else what?” Amon moved closer to the blonde, but Sakaki turned away from him and gave a heavy sigh.


“He threatened my family, Amon.  If I don’t keep quiet and let things continue on, he will make sure that my mother and sister pay for it.”  Sakaki turned back around to face the tall man.  He was caught completely off guard when Amon closed the distance between them and grabbed him by the upper arms, pulling him close enough for their noses to almost touch.  Sakaki was startled both by the proximity and strength of Amon’s grip.


“What else did he say?  Did he say he was going to do anything to you specifically?”  Amon’s voice was flustered, bordering on panicked.  It took Sakaki a few seconds to realize what Amon was asking.  He wanted to know if Zaizen had added a new toy to his collection.


“N-no, not really.  He mentioned that he liked watching Michael and I when we…were together and wanted to keep on enjoying it.  He didn’t say if he wanted to do anything to me himself,” Sakaki stammered. 


Amon’s hazel eyes remained locked with Sakaki’s for a few moments longer before he relented and his gaze dropped to the floor.  Amon released his arms and took a step back from the confused teen. 


“It’s just as well,” Amon said solemnly, “He has you in his web.  It’s only a matter of time before he makes a move on you.”


“Then what the hell are we going to do?  What can we do?” Sakaki asked as he swiped a hand through his hair.  His voice betrayed the desperation he felt.  Sakaki bent over the sink, bracing his arms against the basin and shook his head in disbelief. 


“I don’t know,” He heard Amon say quietly somewhere behind him.  His admission only served to make the unsettled feeling in Sakaki’s belly flare anew.  


“It was horrible,” Sakaki said without looking up.  “He has every moment Michael and I ever shared saved on his computer.  We were never alone; and now we’ll never be alone again.”  Sakaki wanted to hurt something.  He wanted to kick and punch someone until they felt as bad as he did at this moment. 


“Sakaki…..” Amon began, his voice was gentle but he could not find the right words.  Sakaki angrily pushed himself away from the sink and began to pace again.


“That fucking bastard also has every single time he hurt Michael saved away for posterity.  He made me watch the first time he raped him.  Do you have any idea what that was like?” Sakaki voice echoed off the walls.  Amon shook his head. He was too stunned to answer.  


“I guess on some level I had rectified that it was going on behind closed doors but to actually see it…” Sakaki shivered at the thought.  “But that wasn’t all he showed me,” The blonde cautiously meet the tall man’s gaze.  “He had older videos….of you.”                                            

The effect was immediate.  Amon’s eyes went impossibly wide and he staggered backwards, nearly tripping in his shock.  He didn’t stop until his back slammed up against the wall. It was the most emotion Sakaki had seen the man display… ever. He had seen him angry plenty of times before but never had this much raw feeling ever cracked his stony façade.


“He...he showed you?” Amon’s tone was incredulous but his voice was breathless. 


“Yes, he wanted me to know that I could not turn to you for any help.”  Sakaki watched as Amon shook his head in denial, as if by doing that he could change what had transpired. 


“No, you weren’t supposed to see that.  No one was supposed to see that,” Amon said.  His eyes were downcast in shame.  The anguish that was in his voice was almost physically painful to Sakaki. 


“Believe me I didn’t want to.  But what are we going to do?  What is it that he is holding over you- Wait! Amon!”  The dark haired man bolted from the restroom before Sakaki could finish his sentence.  The blonde muttered a few curses under his breath before setting off after him.


When Sakaki reached the control he was stopped by a frantic looking Michael.


“Haruto, what the hell is going on?” The hacker questioned.  “Amon ran through here like a pack of rabid wolves was chasing him.”  Sakaki looked in the crystal blue eyes of his lover and gently put both his hands on Michael’s shoulders. 


“Michael, I’m sorry, but I can’t explain everything right now.  I have to go after Amon,” Sakaki said softly.  Reluctantly, Michael nodded his head.  “When I get back I promise I will tell you everything.”  Sakaki bent down and placed a gentle kiss on Michael’s lips and then turned to grab his helmet. 


“You’d better,” Michael called after him.


By the time Sakaki reached the underground garage, Amon’s car was already gone.  He mounted his motorcycle and pulled his helmet on. 


I have a pretty good idea where he’s heading.  And with that thought, Sakaki revved the engine and pulled out onto the street in search of his wayward leader.








When Sakaki pulled into the parking lot of Takahira Park it was easy to spot Amon’s sleek black sports car.  He pulled into the spot next to it and left his helmet hanging off the handle bar.  Sakaki took a moment to look around and get his bearings.  This was the same entrance that Amon brought him to the other day.  It was a good bet that Amon would be somewhere close to the area to which he had brought Sakaki.   


Sakaki walked down the same path through the park until he came to the bench where Amon had stopped to talk about Michael.  Sure enough, a dark haired man in a long black trench coat was seated on that bench.  The man’s shoulders were slumped and arms were resting on his thighs.  His head was bowed low causing his long hair to obscure his pale face.  He was the picture of absolute misery.


Sakaki approached Amon with extreme caution.  He purposely ground his feet into the dirt so that the other man would hear him coming.  When Sakaki was within a few feet of him Amon’s head snapped up.  For a moment there was anger in his hazel eyes, a clear message for everyone to back off but as soon as he recognized Sakaki the expression morphed into one of profound humiliation.  The tall man’s eyes glistened with unshed tears and there were wet trails down his cheeks from the ones he could not stop.


Crying.  Amon was crying.  Amon never cried.  In fact, Sakaki was hard pressed to recall a time when Amon showed any emotion other than vague indifference.  It took Sakaki’s brain a few seconds to get a handle on this new information.


“Amon?” Sakaki asked softly.  “Are you okay?”  Real good, you idiot.  He’s crying.  Of course he’s not okay.  Sakaki cursed to himself. 


“Hn,” Amon snorted as he looked away. 


Sakaki sighed and took a seat on the other end of the bench.  Never in a million years did he ever think he would be trying to console the stoic team-leader of the STN-J.  Words escaped him at this moment.  It was easy to comfort Michael when he was hurting; it came naturally.  Even before he admitted his feelings to the hacker, the ability was just there.  But this….this was absolutely foreign to Sakaki.  Perhaps it was because Amon always projected himself as being totally self-sufficient and never needing something as pesky as emotions to get in the way.   Whatever it was, Sakaki decided that silence was better at this moment than any bumbling sentiment he could come up with. 


So the two men sat unspeaking for a long while as the sun dipped below the horizon.  The late winter air became steadily cooler until Sakaki could see his breath whenever he exhaled.


“I have a contact,” Amon said, finally breaking the silence.  “This person is close to Zaizen.  They have been gathering information for me.  Right now it’s nothing major, just enough for me to leak to the police or the media.  We are trying to get enough interest in Zaizen and his associates to lead to a full investigation.”


“Who?” Sakaki asked.  Amon looked up from his hands and turned to look Sakaki in the eye.


“I can’t divulge that.  What I need is for you and Michael to figure out a way to get all the footage Zaizen has on Michael and….and me off of Zaizen’s computer.  It will be harder for him to hold it over our heads if he no longer has it.”


“We can do that,” Sakaki said with a sense of renewed hope.


“You need to be very careful, Sakaki.  Maybe you shouldn’t hang around after hours or go back late at night.  Don’t offer yourself up to him.  Now that he has made the threat he sure as hell will take any opportunity he can to get to you.” Amon said with a seriousness that frightened Sakaki.


“But-“ Sakaki began to argue but Amon cut him off.


“I don’t want you to become one of us, don’t you understand?” Amon yelled.  Sakaki’s eyes went wide.  Amon’s face softened at his reaction and he lowered his voice.  “I know it will be hard for you, I do.  But it will be harder for everyone if he traps you, too.  I can’t let another person fall victim to him.” 


“Michael was your replacement, wasn’t he?”  Amon looked down at his hands again and shook his head.


“He was, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let you become his,” Amon said without looking up.  His hands were fisted tightly. 


“So, what now?”


“Now, we act like nothing is different.” Amon lifted his gaze to the setting sun before turning to the blonde haired teen next to him.  “Hopefully my contact will be able to get me some useable information soon.  In the meantime, try not to let him corner you. If he does...you will have to go along with it.” 


Sakaki swallowed the lump in his throat.  The situation was definitely much worse than it was but at least now there was some small glimmer of hope.  He just needed to avoid Zaizen.  Sakaki sighed heavily as he stood.


“I’m going to go back to the office to fill Michael in on what’s going on.  Are you coming back?”


“I will.  I just need some more time to… sort some things out.”   


“Then I’ll see you later,” Sakaki said and Amon gave a nod in acknowledgement. 


Sakaki left the man alone to battle whatever internal demons he had and walked back to the parking lot.  Just as he was about to start the engine of his motorcycle a random thought crossed his mind.  I wonder if Amon ever had anyone to comfort him when he was hurting.







            Sakaki pulled into his usual parking spot in the underground garage of Raven’s Flat.  He noticed with elation that Zaizen’s car was not there and rushed to get up to the office.  When he stepped out of the elevator he could see Michael leaning over the side of his desk to see who it was.  The redhead’s face lit up when he saw Sakaki.


            “Haruto!” Michael called out as he rushed to meet the blonde.  The two embraced each other tightly as if it had been years since they had last seen each other.  “What’s going on?” the hacker asked when he saw the serious look in his lover’s pale violet eyes.


            “Have a seat and I’ll explain,” Sakaki said as he motioned towards Michael’s desk.  Michael sat down in his chair and watched as Sakaki pulled the headphone cord out of the jack in his stereo.  The blond pressed play on whatever CD was in it and the room was suddenly filled with heavy metal music.  Sakaki turned the volume up until the speakers began to crackle.


            “What are you doing? Don’t you think that’s a little loud?” Michael asked.  Sakaki grabbed a chair and pulled up next to his lover.  He leaned forward until his lips brushed against the other boy’s ear.


            “I’m doing this so that our voices will be covered by the music,” Sakaki told the other boy who looked shocked for a moment but then realized the importance of what was to be said.   


            With the screaming vocals and thundering guitars of whatever group was performing acting as their cover, Sakaki told Michael everything.  He told him about how Zaizen found out about their relationship, how Sakaki’s family had been threatened, and about Amon.  Michael looked ready to faint when Sakaki was finally finished speaking.  The redhead reached over with a shaking hand to turn the music down.


            “I guess I’d better start working then,” Michael said.  He still seemed dazed by what he has just learned.  Sakaki reached out and pulled him into a hug.


            “We’ll get through this.”  Sakaki placed a kiss on the top of Michael’s head.  A small smile touched the hacker’s lips and he turned back to his computer.  “Amon said he was going to come back tonight to help us.”  No sooner had the words left Sakaki’s mouth when the sound of the elevator was heard.  “That must be him,” he added.


            When the elevator doors opened the two lovers didn’t bother to look up from what they were doing to greet Amon.  When the footsteps stopped in front of Michael’s desk the two raised their heads and met not their dark haired leader but Takuma Zaizen himself.  The smiles fell off both of their faces.


            “Ah, excellent,” The grey haired man said with a feral grin.  The delight in his voice was sickening.  “Just the two I was looking for.  If you would please, step into my office.”





Current Mood: recumbentrecumbent
Current Music: Just Like You Imagined- Nine Inch Nails